CHAPTER V
ANIMADVERSIONS ON SOME OF THE WRITERS WHO HAVE RENDERED
WOMEN OBJECTS OF PITY, BORDERING ON CONTEMPT
The opinions speciously supported in some modern publications on
the female character and education, which have given the tone to
most of the observations made, in a more cursory manner, on the
sex, remain now to be examined.
SECTION I
I shall begin with Rousseau, and give a sketch of his character of
woman in his own words, interspersing comments and reflections. My
comments, it is true, will all spring from a few simple principles,
and might have been deduced from what I have already said; but the
artificial structure has been raised with so much ingenuity that it
seems necessary to attack it in a more circumstantial manner, and
make the application myself.
Sophia, says Rousseau, should be as perfect a woman as Emilius is
a man, and to render her so it is necessary to examine the
character which nature has given to the sex.
He then proceeds to prove that woman ought to be weak and passive,
because she has less bodily strength than man; and hence infers
that she was formed to please and to be subject to him, and that it
is her duty to render herself agreeable to her master-- this being
the grand end of her existence.[1] Still, however, to give a little
mock dignity to lust, he insists that man should not exert his
strength, but depend on the will of the woman, when he seeks for
pleasure with her.
"Hence we deduce a third consequence from the different
constitutions of the sexes, which is that the strongest should be
master in appearance, and be dependent, in fact, on the weakest,
and that not from any frivolous practice of gallantry or vanity of
protectorship, but from an invariable law of nature, which,
furnishing woman with a greater facility to excite desires than she
has given man to satisfy them, makes the latter dependent on the
good pleasure of the former, and compels him to endeavour to please
in his turn, in order to obtain her consent that he should be
strongest.[2] On these occasions the most delightful circumstance
a
man finds in his victory is to doubt whether it was the woman's
weakness that yielded to his superior strength, or whether her
inclinations spoke in his favour; the females are also generally
artful enough to leave this matter in doubt. The understanding of
women answers in this respect perfectly to their constitution. So
far from being ashamed of their weakness, they glory in it; their
tender muscles make no resistance; they affect to be incapable of
lifting the smallest burdens, and would blush to be thought robust
and strong. To what purpose is all this? Not merely for the sake of
appearing delicate, but through an artful precaution. It is thus
they provide an excuse beforehand, and a right to be feeble when
they think it expedient."
I have quoted this passage lest my readers should suspect that I
warped the author's reasoning to support my own arguments. I have
already asserted that in educating women these fundamental
principles lead to a system of cunning and lasciviousness.
Supposing woman to have been formed only to please, and be subject
to man, the conclusion is just. She ought to sacrifice every other
consideration to render herself agreeable to him, and let this
brutal desire of self-preservation be the grand spring of all her
actions, when it is proved to be the iron bed of fate, to fit which
her character should be stretched or contracted, regardless of all
moral or physical distinctions. But if, as I think, may be
demonstrated, the purposes of even this life, viewing the whole, be
subverted by practical rules built upon this ignoble base, I may be
allowed to doubt whether woman were created for man; and though the
cry of irreligion, or even atheism, be raised against me, I will
simply declare that were an angel from Heaven to tell me that
Moses' beautiful poetical cosmogony, and the account of the fall of
man, were literally true, I could not believe what my reason told
me was derogatory to the character of the Supreme Being; and,
having no fear of the devil before mine eyes, I venture to call
this a suggestion of reason, instead of resting my weakness on the
broad shoulders of the first seducer of my frail sex.
"It being once demonstrated," continues Rousseau, "that man and
woman are not, nor ought to be, constituted alike in temperament
and character, it follows, of course, that they should not be
educated in the same manner. In pursuing the directions of nature,
they ought, indeed, to act in concert, but they should not be
engaged in the same employments; the end of their pursuits should
be the same, but the means they should take to accomplish them,
and, of consequence, their tastes and inclinations, should be
different
. . . . .
"Whether I consider the peculiar destination of the sex, observe
their inclinations, or remark their duties, all things equally
concur to point out the peculiar method of education best adapted
to them. Woman and man were made for each other, but their mutual
dependence is not the same. The men depend on the women only on
account of their desires; the women on the men both on account of
their desires and their necessities. We could subsist better
without them than they without us.
. . . . .
"For this reason the education of the women should be always
relative to the men. To please, to be useful to us, to make us love
and esteem them, to educate us when young, and take care of us when
grown up, to advise, to console us, to render our lives easy and
agreeable--these are the duties of women at all times, and what
they should be taught in their infancy. So long as we fail to recur
to this principle, we run wide of the mark, and all the precepts
which are given them contribute neither to their happiness nor our
own.
. . . . .
"Girls are from their earliest infancy fond of dress. Not content
with being pretty, they are desirous of being thought so. We see,
by all their little airs, that this thought engages their
attention; and they are hardly capable of understanding what is
said to them, before they are to be governed by talking to them of
what people will think of their behaviour. The same motive,
however, indiscreetly made use of with boys, has not the same
effect. Provided they are let pursue their amusements at pleasure,
they care very little what people think of them. Time and pains are
necessary to subject boys to this motive.
"Whencesoever girls derive this first lesson, it is a very good
one. As the body is born, in a manner, before the soul, our first
concern should be to cultivate the former; this order is common to
both sexes, but the object of that cultivation is different. In the
one sex it is the development of corporeal powers; in the other,
that of personal charms. Not that either the quality of strength or
beauty ought to be confined exclusively to one sex, but only that
the order of the cultivation of both is in that respect reversed.
Women certainly require as much strength as to enable them to move
and act gracefully, and men as much address as to qualify them to
act with ease.
. . . . .
"Children of both sexes have a great many amusements in common; and
so they ought; have they not also many such when they are grown up?
Each sex has also its peculiar taste to distinguish in this
particular. Boys love sports of noise and activity; to beat the
drum, to whip the top, and to drag about their little carts: girls,
on the other hand, are fonder of things of show and ornament; such
as mirrors, trinkets, and dolls: the doll is the peculiar amusement
of the females; from whence we see their taste plainly adapted to
their destination. The physical part of the art of pleasing lies in
dress; and this is all which children are capacitated to cultivate
of that art.
. . . . .
"Here then we see a primary propensity firmly established, which
you need only to pursue and regulate. The little creature will
doubtless be very desirous to know how to dress up her doll, to
make its sleeve-knots, its flounces, its head-dress, etc., she is
obliged to have so much recourse to the people about her, for their
assistance in these articles, that it would be much more agreeable
to her to owe them all to her own industry. Hence we have a good
reason for the first lessons that are usually taught these young
females: in which we do not appear to be setting them a task, but
obliging them, by instructing them in what is immediately useful to
themselves. And, in fact, almost all of them learn with reluctance
to read and write; but very readily apply themselves to the use of
their needles. They imagine themselves already grown up, and think
with pleasure that such qualifications will enable them to decorate
themselves." This is certainly only an education of the body; but
Rousseau is not the only man who has indirectly said that merely
the person of a young woman, without any mind, unless animal
spirits come under that description, is very pleasing. To render it
weak, and what some may call beautiful, the under- standing is
neglected, and girls forced to sit still, play with dolls and
listen to foolish conversations;--the effect of habit is insisted
upon as an undoubted indication of nature. I know it was Rousseau's
opinion that the first years of youth should be employed to form
the body, though in educating Emilius he deviates from this plan;
yet, the difference between strengthening the body, on which
strength of mind in a great measure depends, and only giving it an
easy motion, is very wide.
Rousseau's observations, it is proper to remark, were made in a
country where the art of pleasing was refined only to extract the
grossness of vice. He did not go back to nature, or his ruling
appetite disturbed the operations of reason, else he would not have
drawn these crude inferences.
In France boys and girls, particularly the latter, are only
educated to please, to manage their persons, and regulate the
exterior behaviour; and their minds are corrupted, at a very early
age, by the worldly and pious cautions they receive to guard them
against immodesty. I speak of past times. The very confessions
which mere children were obliged to make, and the questions asked
by the holy men, I assert these facts on good authority, were
sufficient to impress a sexual character; and the education of
society was a school of coquetry and art. At the age of ten or
eleven; nay, often much sooner, girls began to coquet, and talked,
unreproved, of establishing themselves in the world by marriage.
In short, they were treated like women, almost from their very
birth, and compliments were listened to instead of instruction.
These weakening the mind, Nature was supposed to have acted like a
step-mother, when she formed this afterthought of creation.
Not allowing them understanding, however, it was but consistent to
subject them to authority independent of reason; and to prepare
them for this subjection, he gives the following advice:
"Girls ought to be active and diligent; nor is that all; they
should also be early subjected to restraint. This misfortune, if it
really be one, is inseparable from their sex; nor do they ever
throw it off but to suffer more cruel evils. They must be subject,
all their lives, to the most constant and severe restraint, which
is that of decorum: it is, therefore, necessary to accustom them
early to such confinement, that it may not afterwards cost them too
dear; and to the suppression of their caprices, that they may the
more readily submit to the will of others. If, indeed, they be fond
of being always at work, they should be sometimes compelled to lay
it aside. Dissipation, levity, and inconstancy, are faults that
readily spring up from their first propensities, when corrupted or
perverted by too much indulgence. To prevent this abuse, we should
teach them, above all things, to lay a due restraint on themselves.
The life of a modest woman is reduced, by our absurd institutions,
to a perpetual conflict with herself: not but it is just that this
sex should partake of the sufferings which arise from those evils
it hath caused us."
And why is the life of a modest woman a perpetual conflict? I
should answer, that this very system of education makes it so.
Modesty, temperance, and self-denial, are the sober offspring of
reason; but when sensibility is nurtured at the expense of the
understanding, such weak beings must be restrained by arbitrary
means, and be subjected to continual conflicts; but give their
activity of mind a wider range, and nobler passions and motives
will govern their appetites and sentiments.
"The common attachment and regard of a mother, nay, mere habit,
will make her beloved by her children, if she do nothing to incur
their hate. Even the constraint she lays them under, if well
directed, will increase their affection, instead of lessening it;
because a state of dependence being natural to the sex, they
perceive themselves formed for obedience."
This is begging the question; for servitude not only debases the
individual, but its effects seem to be transmitted to posterity.
Considering the length of time that women have been dependent, is
it surprising that some of them hunger in chains, and fawn like the
spaniel ? " These dogs," observes a naturalist, " at first kept
their ears erect; but custom has superseded nature, and a token of
fear is become a beauty."
"For the same reason," adds Rousseau, "women have, or ought to
have, but little liberty; they are apt to indulge themselves
excessively in what is allowed them. Addicted in everything to
extremes, they are even more transported at their diversions than
boys."
The answer to this is very simple. Slaves and mobs have always
indulged themselves in the same excesses, when once they broke
loose from authority. The bent bow recoils with violence, when the
hand is suddenly relaxed that forcibly held it; and sensibility,
the plaything of outward circumstances, must be subjected to
authority, or moderated by reason.
"There results," he continues, "from this habitual restraint a
tractableness which women have occasion for during their whole
lives, as they constantly remain either under subjection to the
men, or to the opinions of mankind; and are never permitted to set
themselves above those opinions. The first and most important
qualification in a woman is good nature or sweetness of temper:
formed to obey a being so imperfect as man, often full of vices,
and always full of faults, she ought to learn betimes even to
suffer injustice, and to bear the insults of a husband without
complaint; it is not for his sake, but her own, that she should be
of a mild disposition. The perverseness and ill-nature of the women
only serve to aggravate their own misfortunes, and the misconduct
of their husbands; they might plainly perceive that such are not
the arms by which they gain the superiority."
Formed to live with such an imperfect being as man they ought to
learn from the exercise of their faculties the necessity of
forbearance: but all the sacred rights of humanity are violated by
insisting on blind obedience; or, the most sacred rights belong
only to man.
The being who patiently endures injustice, and silently bears
insults, will soon become unjust, or unable to discern right from
wrong. Besides, I deny the fact, this is not the true way to form
or meliorate the temper; for, as a sex, men have better tempers
than women, because they are occupied by pursuits that interest the
head as well as the heart; and the steadiness of the head gives a
healthy temperature to the heart. People of sensibility have seldom
good tempers. The formation of the temper is the cool work of
reason, when, as life advances, she mixes with happy art, jarring
elements. I never knew a weak or ignorant person who had a good
temper, though that constitutional good humour, and that docility,
which fear stamps on the behaviour, often obtains the name. I say
behaviour, for genuine meekness never reached the heart or mind,
unless as the effect of reflection; and that simple restraint
produces a number of peccant humours in domestic life, many
sensible men will allow, who find some of these gentle irritable
creatures, very troublesome companions.
"Each sex," he further argues, "should preserve its peculiar tone
and manner; a meek husband may make a wife impertinent; but
mildness of disposition on the woman's side will always bring a man
back to reason, at least if he be not absolutely a brute, and will
sooner or later triumph over him."
Perhaps the mildness of reason might sometimes have this defect.
but abject fear always inspires contempt; and tears are only
eloquent when they flow down fair cheeks.
Of what materials can that heart be composed, which can mdt when
insulted, and instead of revolting at injustice, kiss the rod? It
is unfair to infer that her virtue is built on narrow views and
selfishness, who can caress a man, with true feminine softness, the
very moment when he treats her tyrannically. Nature never dictated
such insincerity; and, though prudence of this sort be termed a
virtue, morality becomes vague when any part is supposed to rest on
falsehood. These are mere expedients, and expedients are only
useful for the moment.
Let the husband beware of trusting too implicitly to this i servile
obedience; for if his wife can with winning sweetness, caress him
when angry, and when she ought to be angry, unless contempt has
stifled a natural effervescence, she may do the same after parting
with a lover. These are all preparations for adultery; or, should
the fear of the world, or of hell, restrain her desire of pleasing
other men, when she can no longer please her husband, what
substitute can be found by a being who was only formed, by nature
and art, to please man? what can make her amends for this
privation, or where is she to seek for a fresh employment? where
find sufficient strength of mind to determine to begin the search,
when her habits are fixed, and vanity has long ruled her chaotic
mind?
But this partial moralist recommends cunning systematically and
plausibly.
"Daughters should be always submissive; their mothers, however,
should not be inexorable. To make a young person tractable, she
ought not to be made unhappy; to make her modest she ought not to
be rendered stupid. on the contrary, I should not be displeased at
her being permitted to use some art, not to elude punishment in
case of disobedience, but to exempt herself from the necessity of
obeying. It is not necessary to make her dependence burdensome, but
only to let her feel it. Subtility is a talent natural to the sex;
and, as I am persuaded, all our natural inclinations are right and
good in themselves, I am of opinion this should be cultivated as
well as the others: it is requisite for us only to prevent its
abuse."
"Whatever is, is right," he then proceeds triumphantly to infer.
Granted; yet, perhaps, no aphorism ever contained a more
paradoxical assertion. It is a solemn truth with respect to God.
He, reverentially I speak, sees the whole at once, and saw its just
proportions in the womb of time; but man, who can only inspect
disjointed parts, finds many things wrong; and it is a part of the
system, and therefore, right, that he should endeavour to alter
what appears to him to be so, even while he bows to the wisdom of
his Creator, and respects the darkness he labours to disperse.
The inference that follows is just, supposing the principle to be
sound. "The superiority of address, peculiar to the female sex, is
a very equitable indemnification for their inferiority in point of
strength: without this, woman would not be the companion of
marriage, but his slave; it is by her superior art and ingenuity
that she preserves her equality, and governs him while she affects
to obey. Woman has everything against her, as well our faults, as
her own timidity and weakness; she has nothing in her favour, but
her subtility and her beauty. Is it not very reasonable, therefore,
she should cultivate both?" Greatness of mind can never dwell with
cunning, or address; for I shall not boggle about words, when their
direct signification is insincerity and falsehood, but content
myself with observing, that if any class of mankind be so created
that it must necessarily be educated by rules not strictly
deducible from truth, virtue is an affair of convention. How could
Rousseau dare to assert, after giving this advice, that in the
grand end of existence the object of both sexes should be the same,
when he well knew that the mind, formed by its pursuits, is
expanded by great views swallowing up little ones, or that it
becomes itself little?
Men have superior strength of body; but were it not for mistaken
notions of beauty, women would acquire sufficient to enable them to
earn their own subsistence, the true definition of independence;
and to bear those bodily inconveniences and exertions that are
requisite to strengthen the mind. Let us then, by being allowed to
take the same exercise as boys, not only during infancy, but youth,
arrive at perfection of body, that we may know how far the natural
superiority of man extends. For what reason or virtue can be
expected from a creature when the seed-time of life is neglected?
None; did not the winds of heaven casually scatter many useful
seeds in fallow ground."
Beauty cannot be acquired by dress, and coquetry is an art not so
early and speedily attained. While girls are yet young, however,
they are in a capacity to study agreeable gesture, a pleasing
modulation of voice, an easy carriage and behaviour; as well as to
take the advantage of gracefully looks and attitudes to time,
place, and occasion. Their application, therefore, should not be
solely confined to the arts of industry and the needle, when they
come to display other talents, whose utility is already apparent.
"For my part, I would have a young Englishwoman cultivate her
agreeable talents, in order to please her future husband, with as
much care and assiduity as a young Circassian cultivates hers, to
fit her for the harem of an Eastern bashaw.
To render women completely insignificant, he adds: "The tongues of
women are very voluble; they speak earlier, more readily, and more
agreeably, than the men; they are accused also of speaking much
more: but so it ought to be, and I should be very ready to convert
this reproach into a compliment; their lips and eyes have the same
activity, and for the same reason. A man speaks of what he knows,
a woman of what pleases her; the one requires knowledge, the other
taste; the principal object of a man's discourse should be what is
useful, that of a woman's what is agreeable. There ought to be
nothing in common between their different conversation but truth.
"We ought not, therefore, to restrain the prattle of girls, in the
same manner as we should that of boys, with that severe question,
To what purpose are you talking? but by another, which is no less
difficult to answer, How will your discourse be received? In
infancy, while they are as yet incapable to discern good from evil,
they ought to observe it, as a law never to say anything
disagreeable to those whom they are speaking to. What will render
the practice of this rule also the more difficult is, that it must
ever be subordinate to the former, of never speaking falsely or
telling an untruth." To govern the tongue in this manner must
require great address indeed, and it is too much practised both by
men and women. out of the abundance ;)f the heart how few speak !
So few that I, who love simplicity, would gladly give up politeness
for a quarter of the virtue that has been sacrificed to an
equivocal quality which at best should only be the polish of
virtue.
But, to complete the sketch. "It is easy to be conceived, that if
male children be not in a capacity to form any true notions of
religion, those ideas must be greatly above the conception of the
females: it is for this very reason, I would begin to speak to them
the earlier on this subject; for if we were to wait till they were
in a capacity to discuss methodically such profound questions, we
should run a risk of never speaking to
them on this subject as long as they lived. Reason in women is a
practical reason, capacitating them artfully to discover the means
of attaining a known end, but which would never enable them to
discover that end itself. The social relations of the sexes are
indeed truly admirable: from their union there results a moral
person, of which woman may be termed the eyes, and man the hand,
with this dependence on each other, that it is from the man that
the woman is to learn what she is to see, and it is of the woman
that man is to learn what he ought to do. If woman could recur to
the first principles of things as well as man, and man was
capacitated to enter into their minutiae as well as woman, always
independent of each other, they would live in perpetual discord,
and their union could not subsist. But in the present harmony which
naturally subsists between them, their different faculties tend to
one common end: it is difficult to say which of them conduces the
most to it: each follows the impulse of the other; each is
obedient, and both are masters.
"As the conduct of a woman is subservient to the public opinion,
her faith in matters of religion should, for that very reason, be
subject to authority. Every daughter ought to be of the same
religion as her mother, and every wife to be of the same religion
as her husband: for, though such religion should be false, that
docility which induces the mother and daughter to submit to the
order of nature, takes away, in the sight of God, the criminality
of their error.[3] As they are not in a capacity to judge for
themselves, they ought to abide by the decision of their fathers
and husbands as confidently as by that of the Church.
"As authority ought to regulate the religion of the women, it is
not so needful to explain to them the reasons for their belief, as
to lay down precisely the tenets they are to believe: for the
creed, which presents only obscure ideas to the mind, is the source
of fanaticism; and that which presents absurdities, leads to
infidelity."
Absolute, uncontroverted authority, it seems, must subsist
somewhere: but is not this a direct and exclusive appropriation of
reason? The rights of humanity have been thus confined to the male
line from Adam downwards.
Rousseau would carry his male aristocracy still further, he
insinuates, that he should not blame those, who contend _ leaving
woman in a state of the most profound ignorance, if it were not
necessary in order to preserve her chastity and justify the man's
choice, in the eyes of the world, to give her a little knowledge of
men, and the customs produced by human passions; else she might
propagate at home without being rendered less voluptuous and
innocent by the exercise of her understanding: excepting, indeed,
during the first year of marriage, when she might employ it to
dress like Sophia. "Her dress is extremely modest in appearance,
and yet very coquettish in fact: she does not make a display of her
charms, she conceals them; but in concealing them, she knows how to
affect your imagination. Everyone who sees her will say, There is
a modest and discreet girl; but while you are near her, your eyes
and affections wander all over her person, so that you cannot
withdraw them; and you would conclude, that every part of her
dress, simple as it seems, was only put in its proper order to be
taken to pieces by the imagination." Is this modesty? Is this a
preparation for immortality? Again, What opinion are we to form of
a system of education, when the author says of his heroine, "that
with her, doing things well, is but a secondary concern; her
principal concern is to do them neatly."
Secondary, in fact, are all her respecting religion, he makes her
accustomed to submission--"Your husband will instruct you in good
time."
After thus cramping a woman's mind, if, in order to keep it fair,
he have not made it quite reflect, that a reflecting man may when
he is tired of caressing her. What has she to reflect about who
must obey? and would it not be a refinement on cruelty only to open
her mind to make the darkness and misery of her fate visible? Yet
these are his sensible remarks; how consistent with what I have
already been obliged to quote, to give a fair view of the subject,
the reader may determine.
"They who pass their whole lives in working for their daily bread,
have no ideas beyond their business or their interest, and all
their understanding seems to lie in their fingers' ends. This
ignorance is neither prejudicial to their integrity nor their
morals; it is often of service to them. Sometimes, by means of
reflection, we are led to compound with our duty, and we conclude
by substituting a jargon of words in the room of things. our own
conscience is the most enlightened philosopher. There is no need to
be acquainted with Tully's offices, to make a man of probity; and
perhaps the most virtuous woman in the world is the least
acquainted with the definition of virtue. But it is no less true,
that an improved understanding only can render society agreeable;
and it is a melancholy thing for a father of a family, who is fond
of home, to be obliged to be always wrapped up in himself, and to
have nobody about him to whom he can impart his sentiments.
"Besides, how should a woman void of reflection be capable of
educating her children? How should she discern what is proper for
them? How should she incline them to those virtues she is
unacquainted with, or to that merit of which she has no idea? She
can only soothe or chide them; render them insolent or timid; she
will make them formal coxcombs, or ignorant blockheads, but will
never make these sensible or amiable." How indeed should she, when
her husband is not always at hand to lend her his reason?--when
they both together make but one moral being. A blind will, " eyes
without hands," would go a very little way; and perchance his
abstract reason, that should concentrate the scattered beams of her
practical reason, may be employed in judging of the flavour of
wine, descanting on the sauces most proper for turtle; or, more
profoundly intent at a card-table, he may be generalising his ideas
as he bets away his fortune, leaving all the minutiae of education
to his helpmate, or to chance.
But, granting that woman ought to be beautiful, innocent, and
silly, to render her a more alluring and indulgent companion;
--what is her understanding sacrificed for? And why is all this
preparation necessary only, according to Rousseau's own account, to
make her the mistress of her husband, a very short time? For no man
ever insisted more on the transient nature of love. Thus speaks the
philosopher, "Sensual pleasures are transient. The habitual state
of the affections always loses by their gratification. The
imagination, which decks the object of our desires, is lost in
fruition. Excepting the Supreme Being, who is self-existent, there
is nothing beautiful but what is ideal."
But he returns to his unintelligible paradoxes again, when he thus
addresses Sophia--"Emilius, in becoming your husband, is become
your master, and claims your obedience. Such is the order of
nature. When a man is married, however, to such a wife as Sophia,
it is proper he should be directed by her. This is also agreeable
to the order of nature. It is, therefore, to give you as much
authority over his heart as his sex gives him over your person that
I have made you the arbiter of his pleasures. It may cost you,
perhaps, some disagreeable self-denial; but you will be certain of
maintaining your empire over him, if you can preserve it over shows
me that this difficult attempt does not surpass your courage.
"Would you have your husband constantly at your feet, keep him at
some distance from your person. You will long maintain the authority
in love, if you know but how to render your favours rare and
valuable. It is thus you may employ even the arts of coquetry in
the service of virtue, and those of love in that of reason." I
shall close my extracts with a just description of a comfortable
couple: " And yet you must not imagine that even such management
will always suffice. Whatever precaution be taken, enjoyment will
by degrees take off the edge of passion. But when love hath lasted
as long as possible, a pleasing habitude supplies its place, and
the attachment of a mutual confidence succeeds to the transports of
passion. Children often form a more agreeable and permanent
connection between married people then even love itself. When you
cease to be the mistress of Emilius, you will continue to be his
wife and friend--you will be the mother of his children."[4]
Children, he truly observes, form a much more permanent connection
between married people than love. Beauty, he declares, will not be
valued, or even seen, after a couple have lived six months
together; artificial graces and coquetry will likewise pall on the
senses. Why, then, does he say that a girl should be educated for
her husband with the same care as for an Eastern harem?
I now appeal from the reveries of fancy and refined licentiousness
to the good sense of mankind, whether, if the object of education
be to prepare women to become chaste wives and sensible mothers,
the method so plausibly recommended in the foregoing sketch be the
one best calculated to produce those ends? Will it be allowed that
the surest way to make a wife chaste is to teach her to practise
the wanton arts of a mistress, termed virtuous coquetry, by the
sensualist who can no longer relish the artless charms of
sincerity, or taste the pleasure arising from a tender intimacy,
when confidence is unchecked by suspicion, and rendered interesting
by sense?
The man who can be contented to live with a pretty, useful
companion, without a mind, has lost in voluptuous gratifications a
taste for more refined enjoyments; he has never felt the calm
satisfaction that refreshes the parched heart like the silent dew
of heaven--of being beloved by one who could understand him. In the
society of his wife he is still alone, unless when the man is sunk
in the brute. "The charm of life," says a grave philosophical
reasoner, is "sympathy; nothing pleases us more than to observe in
other men a fellow-feeling with all the emotions of our own breast"
But according to the tenor of reasoning by which women are kept
from the tree of knowledge, the important years of youth, the
usefulness of age, and the rational hopes of futurity, are all to
be sacrificed to render women an object of desire for a short time.
Besides, how could Rousseau expect them to be virtuous and constant
when reason is neither allowed to be the foundation of their
virtue, nor truth the object of their inquiries?
But all Rousseau's errors in reasoning arose from sensibility, and
sensibility to their charms women are very ready to forgive. When
he should have reasoned he became impassioned, and reflection
inflamed his imagination instead of enlightening his understanding.
Even his virtues also led him farther astray; for, born with a warm
constitution and lively fancy, nature carried him toward the other
sex with such eager fondness that he soon became lascivious. Had he
given way to these desires, the fire would have extinguished itself
in a natural manner, but virtue, and a romantic kind of delicacy,
made him practise self-denial; yet when fear, delicacy, or virtue
restrained him, he debauched his imagination, and reflecting on the
sensations to which fancy gave force, he traced them in the most
glowing colours, and sunk them deep into his soul.
He then sought for solitude, not to sleep with the man of nature,
or calmly investigate the causes of things under the shade where
Sir Isaac Newton indulged contemplation, but merely to indulge his
feelings. And so warmly has he painted what he forcibly felt, that
interesting the heart and inflaming the imagination of his readers,
in proportion to the strength of their fancy, they imagine that
their understanding is convinced when they only sympathise with a
poetic writer, who skilfully exhibits the objects of sense most
voluptuously shadowed or gracefully veiled; and thus making us feel
whilst dreaming that we reason, erroneous conclusions are left in
the mind.
Why was Rousseau's life divided between ecstasy and misery? Can ny
other answer be given than this, that the effervescence of his
imagination produced both; but had his fancy been allowed to cool,
it is possible that he might have acquired more strength of mind.
Still, if the purpose of life be to educate the intellectual part
of man, all-with respect to him was right; yet had not death led to
a nobler scene of action, it is probable that he would have enjoyed
more equal happiness on earth, and have felt the calm sensations of
the man of nature, instead of being prepared for another stage of
existence by nourishing the passions which agitate the civilised
man.
But peace to his manes! I war not with his ashes, but his opinions.
I war only with the sensibility that led him to degrade woman by
making her the slave of love.
"--- Cursed vassalage,
First idolised till love's hot fire be o'er,
Then slaves to those who courted us before."--DRYDEN.
The pernicious tendency of those books, in which the writers
insidiously degrade the sex whilst they are prostrate before their
personal charms, cannot be too often or too severely exposed.
Let us, my dear contemporaries, arise above such narrow pr judices.
If wisdom be desirable on its own account, if virtue, to deserve
the name, must be founded on knowledge, let us endeavour to
strengthen our minds by reflection till our heads become a balance
for our hearts; let us not confine all our thoughts to the petty
occurrences of the day, or our knowledge to an acquaintance with
our lovers' or husbands' hearts, but let the practice of every duty
be subordinate to the grand one of improving our minds, and
preparing our affections for a more exalted state.
Beware, then, my friends, of suffering the heart to be moved by
every trivial incident; the reed is shaken by a breeze, and
annually dies, but the oak stands firm, and for ages braves the
storm.
Were we, indeed, only created to flutter our hour out and die--why
let us then indulge sensibility, and laugh at the severity of
reason. Yet, alas ! even then we should want strength of body and
mind, and life would be lost in feverish pleasures or wearisome
languor.
But the system of Education, which I earnestly wish to see
exploded, seems to presuppose what ought never to be taken for
granted, that virtue shields us from the casualties of life; and
that Fortune, slipping off her bandage, will smile on a
well-educated female, and bring in her hand an Emilius or a
Telemachus. Whilst, on the contrary, the reward which Virtue
promises to her votaries is confined, it seems clear, to their own
bosoms; and often must they contend with the most vexatious worldly
cares, and bear with the vices and humours of relations for whom
they can never feel a friendship.
There have been many women in the world who, instead of being
supported by the reason and virtue of their fathers and brothers,
have strengthened their own minds by struggling with their vices
and follies; yet have never met with a hero, in the shape of a
husband; who, paying the debt that mankind owed them, might chance
to bring back their reason to its natural dependent state, and
restore the usurped prerogative, of rising above opinion, to man.
SECTION II
Dr. Fordyce's sermons have long made a part of a young woman's
library; nay, girls at school are allowed to read them but I should
instantly dismiss them from my pupil's if I wished to strengthen
her understanding, by leading her to form sound principles on a
broad basis; or, were I only anxious to cultivate her taste, though
they must be allowed to contain many sensible observations.
Dr. Fordyce may have had a very laudable end in view; but these
discourses are written in such an affected style, that were it only
on that account, and had I nothing to object against his
mellifluous precepts, I should not allow girls to peruse them,
unless I designed to hunt every spark of nature out of their
composition, melting every human quality into female meekness and
artificial grace. I say artificial, for true grace arises from some
kind of independence of mind.
Children, careless of pleasing, and only anxious to amuse
themselves, are often very graceful; and the nobility who have
mostly lived with inferiors, and always had the command of money,
acquire a graceful ease of deportment, which should rather be
termed habitual grace of body, than that superior gracefulness
which is truly the expression of the mind. This mental grace, not
noticed by vulgar eyes, often flashes across a rough countenance,
and irradiating every feature, shows simplicity and independence of
mind. It is then we read characters of immortality in the eye, and
see the soul in every gesture, though when at rest, neither the
face nor limbs may have much beauty to recommend them; or the
behaviour, anything peculiar to attract universal attention. The
mass of mankind, however, look for more tangible beauty; yet
simplicity is, in general, admired, when people do not consider
what they admire ? and can there be simplicity without sincerity?
But, to have done with remarks that are in some measure desultory,
though naturally excited by the subject.
In declamatory periods Dr. Fordyce spins out Rousseau's eloquence;
and in most sentimental rant, details his opinions respecting the
female character, and the behaviour which woman ought to assume to
render her lovely.
He shall speak for himself, for thus he makes Nature address man.
"Behold these smiling innocents, whom I have graced with my fairest
gifts, and committed to your protection; behold them with love and
respect; treat them with tenderness and honour. They are timid and
want to be defended. They are frail; oh do not take advantage of
their weakness! Let their fears and blushes endear them. Let their
confidence in you never be abused. But is it possible, that any of
you can be such barbarians, so supremely wicked, as to abuse it?
Can you find in your hearts[5] to despoil the gentle, trusting
creatures of their treasure, or do anything to strip them of their
native robe of virtue? Curst be the impious hand that would dare to
violate the unblemished form of chastity! Thou wretch! thou ruffian
! forbear; nor venture to provoke Heaven's fiercest vengeance." I
know not any comment that can be made seriously on this curious
passage, and I could produce many similar ones; and some, so very
sentimental, that I have heard rational men use the word indecent,
when they mentioned them with disgust.
Throughout there is a display of cold artificial feelings, and that
parade of sensibility which boys and girls should be taught to
despise as the sure mark of a little vain mind. Florid appeals are
made to Heaven, and to the beauteous innocents, the fairest images
of Heaven here below, whilst sober sense is left far behind. This
is not the language of the heart, nor will it ever reach it, though
the ear may be tickled.
I shall be told, perhaps, that the public have been pleased with
these volumes. True--and Hervey's Meditations are :_ read, though
he equally sinned against sense and taste.
I particularly object to the love-like phrases of pumped up
passion, which are everywhere interspersed. If women be ever
allowed to walk without leading-strings, why must they be cajoled
into virtue by artful flattery and sexual compliments? Speak to
them the language of truth and soberness, and away with the lullaby
strains of condescending endearment ! Let them be taught to respect
themselves as rational creatures, and not led to have a passion for
their own insipid persons. It moves my gall to hear a preacher
descanting on dress and needlework; and still more, to hear him
address the British fair, the fairest of the fair, as if they had
only feelings.
Even recommending piety he uses the following argument. "Never,
perhaps, does a fine woman strike more deeply, than when, composed
into pious recollection, and possessed with the noblest
considerations, she assumes, without knowing it, superior dignity
and new graces; so that the beauties of holiness seem to radiate
about her, and the bystanders are almost reduced to fancy her
already worshipping amongst her kindred angels!" Why are women to
be thus bred up with a desire\of conquest? the very word, used in
this sense, gives me a sickly qualm! Do religion and virtue offer
no stronger motives, no brighter reward ? Must they always be
debased by being made to consider the sex of their companions? Must
they be taught always to be pleasing ? And when levelling their
small artillery at the heart of man, is it necessary to tell them
that a little sense is sufficient to render their attention
incredibly soothing? "As a small degree of knowledge entertains in
a woman, so from a woman, though for a different reason, a small
expression of kindness delights, particularly if she have beauty!"
I should have supposed for the same reason.
Why are girls to be told that they resemble angels; but to sink
them below women? Or, that a gentle innocent female is an object
that comes nearer to the idea which we have formed of angels than
any other. Yet they are told, at the same time, that they are only
like angels when they are young and beautiful; consequently, it is
their persons, not their virtues, that procure them this homage.
Idle empty words ! What can such delusive flattery lead to, but
vanity and folly? The lover, it is true, has a poetical licence to
exalt his mistress; his reason is the bubble of his passion, and he
does not utter a falsehood when he borrows the language of
adoration. His imagination may raise the idol of his heart,
unblamed, above humanity; and happy would it be for women, if they
were only flattered by the men who loved them; I mean, who love the
individual, not the sex; but should a grave preacher interlard his
discourses with such fooleries?
In sermons or novels, however, voluptuousness is always true to its
text. Men are allowed by moralists to cultivate, as Nature directs,
different qualities, and assume the different characters, that the
same passions, modified almost to infinity, give to each
individual. A virtuous man may have a choleric or a sanguine
constitution, be gay or grave, unreproved; be firm till he is
almost overbearing, or, weakly submissive, have no will or opinion
of his own; but all women are to be levelled, by meekness and
docility, into one character of yielding softness and gentle
compliance.
I will use the preacher's own words. "Let it be observed, that in
your sex manly exercises are never graceful; that in them a tone
and figure, as well as an air and deportment, of the masculine
kind, are always forbidding; and that men of sensibility desire in
every woman soft features, and a flowing voice, a form, not robust,
and demeanour delicate and gentle."
Is not the following portrait--the portrait of a house slave? "I am
astonished at the folly of many women, who are still reproaching
their husbands for leaving them alone, for preferring this or that
company to theirs, for treating them with this and the other mark
of disregard or indifference; when, to speak the truth, they have
themselves in a great measure to blame. Not that I would justify
the men in anything wrong on their part. But had you behaved to
them with more respectful observance, and a more equal tenderness;
studying their humours, overlooking their mistakes, submitting to
their opinions in matters indifferent, passing by little instances
of unevenness, caprice, or passion, giving soft answers to hasty
words, complaining as seldom as possible, and making it your daily
care to relieve their anxieties and prevent their wishes, to
enliven the hour of dullness, and call up the ideas of felicity:
had you pursued this conduct, I doubt not but you would have
maintained and even increased their esteem, so far as to have
secured every degree of influence that could conduce to their
virtue, or your mutual satisfaction; and your house might at this
day have been the abode of domestic bliss " Such a woman ought to
be an angel--or she is an ass-- for I discern not a trace of the
human character, neither reason nor passion in this domestic
drudge, whose being is absorbed in that of a tyrant's.
Still Dr. Fordyce must have very little acquaintance with the human
heart, if he really supposed that such conduct would bring back
wandering love, instead of exciting contempt. No, beauty,
gentleness, etc., etc., may gain a heart; but esteem, the only
lasting affection, can alone be obtained by virtue supported by
reason. It is respect for the understanding that keeps alive
tenderness for the person.
As these volumes are so frequently put into the hands of young
people, I have taken more notice of them than, strictly speaking,
they deserve; but as they have contributed to vitiate the taste,
and enervate the understanding of many of my fellow-creatures, I
could not pass them silently over.
SECTION III
Such paternal solicitude pervades Dr. Gregory's Legacy to his
Daughters, that I enter on the task of criticism with affectionate
respect; but as this little volume has many attractions to
recommend it to the notice of the most respectable part of my sex,
I cannot silently pass over arguments that so speciously support
opinions which, I think, have had the most baneful effect on the
morals and manners of the female world.
His easy familiar style is particularly suited to the tenor of his
advice, and the melancholy tenderness which his respect for the
memory of a beloved wife, diffuses through the whole work, renders
it very interesting; yet there is a degree of concise elegance
conspicuous in many passages that disturbs this sympathy; and we
pop on the author, when we only expected to meet the--father.
Besides, having two objects in view, he seldom adhered steadily to
either; for wishing to make his daughters amiable, and fearing lest
unhappiness should only be the consequence, of instilling
sentiments that might draw them out of the track of common life
without enabling them to act with consonant independence and
dignity, he checks the natural flow of his thoughts, and neither
advises one thing nor the other.
In the preface he tells them a mournful truth, "that they will
hear, at least once in their lives, the genuine sentiments of a man
who has no interest in deceiving them."
Hapless woman! what can be expected from thee when the beings on
whom thou art said naturally to depend for reason and support, have
all an interest in deceiving thee! This is the root of the evil
that has shed a corroding mildew on all thy virtues; and blighting
in the bud thy opening faculties, has rendered thee the weak thing
thou art! It is this separate interest--this insidious state of
warfare, that undermines morality, and divides mankind!
If love have made some women wretched, how many more has the cold
unmeaning intercourse of gallantry rendered vain and useless ! yet
this heartless attention to the sex is reckoned so manly, so polite
that, till society is very differently organised, I fear, this
vestige of gothic manners will not be done away by a more
reasonable and affectionate mode of conduct. Besides, to strip it
of its imaginary dignity, I must observe, that in the most
uncivilised European states this lip-service prevails in a very
great degree, accompanied with extreme dissoluteness of morals. In
Portugal, the country that I particularly allude to, it takes place
of the most serious moral obligations! for a man is seldom
assassinated when in the company of a woman. The savage hand of
rapine is unnerved by this chivalrous spirit; and, if the stroke of
vengeance cannot be stayed, the lady is entreated to pardon the
rudeness and depart in peace, though sprinkled, perhaps, with her
husband's or brother's blood.
I shall pass over his strictures on religion, because I mean to
discuss that subject in a separate chapter.
The remarks relative to behaviour, though many of them very
sensible, I entirely disapprove of, because it appears to me to be
beginning, as it were, at the wrong end. A cultivated
understanding, and an affectionate heart, will never want starched
rules of decorum-- something more substantial than seemliness will
be the result; and, without understanding the behaviour here
recommended, would be rank affectation. Decorum, indeed, is the one
thing needful !--decorum is to supplant nature, and banish all
simplicity and variety of character out of the female world. Yet
what good end can all this superficial counsel produce ? It is,
however, much easier to point out this or that mode of behaviour,
than to set the reason to work; but, when the mind has been stored
with useful knowledge, and strengthened by being employed, the
regulation of the behaviour may safely be left to its guidance.
Why, for instance, should the following caution be given when art
of every kind must contaminate the mind; and why entangle the grand
motives of action, which reason and religion equally combine to
enforce, with pitiful worldly shifts and sleight-of-hand tricks to
gain the applause of gaping tasteless fools? "Be even cautious in
displaying your good sense.[6] It will be thought you assume a
superiority over the rest of the company. But if you happen to have
any learning, keep it a profound secret, especially from the men,
who generally look with a jealous and malignant eye on a woman of
great parts, and a cultivated understanding." If men of real merit,
as he afterwards observes, be superior to this meanness, where is
the necessity that the behaviour of the whole sex should be
modulated to please fools, or men, who having little claim to
respect as individuals, choose to keep close in their phalanx. Men,
indeed, who insist on their common superiority, having only this
sexual superiority, are certainly very excusable.
There would be no end to rules for behaviour, if it be proper
always to adopt the tone of the company; for thus, for ever varying
the key, a flat would often pass for a natural note.
Surely it would have been wiser to have advised women to improve
themselves till they rose above the fumes of vanity; and then to
let the public opinion come round--for where are rules of
accommodation to stop? The narrow path of truth and virtue inclines
neither to the right nor left--it is a straightforward business,
and they who are earnestly pursuing their road, may bound over many
decorous prejudices, without leaving modesty behind. Make the heart
clean, and give the head employment, and I will venture to predict
that there will be nothing offensive in the behaviour.
The air of fashion, which many young people are so eager to attain,
always strikes me like the studied attitudes of some modern
pictures, copied with tasteless servility after the antiques; the
soul is left out, and none of the parts are tied together by what
may properly be termed character. This varnish of fashion, which
seldom sticks very close to sense, may dazzle the weak; but leave
nature to itself, and it will seldom disgust the wise. Besides,
when a woman has sufficient sense not to pretend to anything which
she does not understand in some degree, there is no need of
determining to hide her talents under a bushel. Let things take
their natural course, and all will be well.
It is this system of dissimulation, throughout the volume, that I
despise. Women are always to seem to be this and that--yet virtue
might apostrophise them, in the words of Hamlet--Seems! I know not
seems! Have that within passeth show!
Still the same tone occurs; for in another place, after
recommending, without sufficiently discriminating delicacy, he
adds,-- "The men will complain of your reserve. They will assure
you that a franker behaviour would make you more amiable. But,
trust me, they are not sincere when they tell you so. I acknowledge
that on some occasions it might render you more agreeable as
companions, but it would make you less amiable as women: an
important distinction, which many of your sex are not aware of."
This desire of being always women, is the very consciousness that
degrades the sex. Excepting with a lover, I must repeat with
emphasis, a former observation,--it would be well if they were only
agreeable or rational companions. But in this respect his advice is
even inconsistent with a passage which I mean to quote with the
most marked approbation.
"The sentiment, that a woman may allow all innocent freedoms,
provided her virtue is secure, is both grossly indelicate and
dangerous, and has proved fatal to many of your sex." With this
opinion I perfectly coincide. A man, or a woman, of any feeling,
must always wish to convince a beloved object that it is the
caresses of the individual, not the sex, that are received and
returned with pleasure; and, that the heart, rather than the
senses, is moved. Without this natural delicacy, love becomes a
selfish personal gratification that soon degrades the character.
I carry this sentiment still further. Affection, when love is out
of the question, authorises many personal endearments, that
naturally flowing from an innocent heart, give life to the
behaviour; but the personal intercourse of appetite, gallantry, or
vanity, is despicable. When a man squeezes the hand of a pretty
woman, handing her to a carriage, whom he has never seen before,
she will consider such an impertinent freedom in the light of an
insult, if she have any true delicacy, instead of being flattered
by this unmeaning homage to beauty. These are the privileges of
friendship, or the momentary homage which the heart pays to virtue,
when it flashes suddenly on the notice--mere animal spirits have no
claim to the kindnesses of affection.
Wishing to feed the affections with what is now the food of vanity,
I would fain persuade my sex to act from simpler principles. Let
them merit love, and they will obtain it, though they may never be
told that--"The power of a fine woman over the hearts of men, of
men of the finest parts, is even beyond what she conceives."
I have already noticed the narrow cautions with respect to
duplicity, female softness, delicacy of constitution; for these are
the changes which he rings round without ceasing--in a more
decorous manner, it is true, than Rousseau; but it all comes home
to the same point, and whoever is at the trouble to analyse these
sentiments, will find the first principles not quite so delicate as
the superstructure.
The subject of amusements is treated in too cursory a manner; but
with the same spirit.
When I treat of friendship, love, and marriage, it will be found
that we materially differ in opinion; I shall not then forestall
what I have to observe on these important subjects; but confine my
remarks to the general tenor of them, to that cautious family
prudence, to those confined views of partial unenlightened
affection, which exclude pleasure and improvement, by vainly
wishing to ward off sorrow and error, and by thus guarding the
heart and mind, destroy also all their energy. It is far better to
be often deceived than never to trust; to be disappointed in love
than never to love; to lose a husband's fondness than forfeit his
esteem.
Happy would it be for the world, and for individuals, of course, if
all this unavailing solicitude to attain worldly happiness, on a
confined plan, were turned into an anxious desire to improve the
understanding. "Wisdom is the principal thing: Therefore get
wisdom; and with all thy gettings get understanding." "How long, ye
simple ones, will ye love simplicity, and hate knowledge?" saith
Wisdom to the daughters of men.
SECTION IV
I do not mean to allude to all the writers who have written on the
subject of female manners--it would, in fact, be only beating over
the old ground, for they have, in general, written in the same
strain; but attacking the boasted prerogative of man--the
prerogative that may emphatically be called the iron sceptre of
tyranny, the original sin of tyrants, I declare against all power
built on prejudices, however hoary.
If the submission demanded be founded on justice--there is no
appealing to a higher power--for God is justice itself. Let us
then, as children of the same parent, if not bastardised by being
the younger born, reason together, and learn to submit to the
authority of Reason--when her voice is distinctly heard. But, if it
proved, that this throne of prerogative only rests on a chaotic
mass of prejudices, that have no inherent principle of order to
keep them together, or on an elephant, tortoise, or even the mighty
shoulders of a son of the earth, they may escape, who dare to brave
the consequence, without any breach of duty, without sinning
against the order of things.
Whilst reason raises man above the brutal herd, and death is big
with promises, they alone are subject to blind authority who have
no reliance on their own strength. They are free --who will be
free! --[7]
The being who can govern itself has nothing to fear in life; but if
anything be dearer than its own respect, the price must be paid to
the last farthing. Virtue, like everything valuable, must be loved
for herself alone; or she will not take up her abode with us. She
will not impart that peace, " which passeth understanding," when
she is merely made the stilts of reputation; and respected, with
pharisaical exactness, because "honesty is the best policy."
That the plan of life which enables us to carry some knowledge and
virtue into another world, is the one best calculated to ensure
content in this, cannot be denied; yet few people act according to
this principle, though it be universally allowed that it admits not
of dispute. Present pleasure, or present power, carry before it
these sober convictions; and it is for the day, not for life, that
man bargains with happiness. How few!--how very few! have
sufficient foresight, or resolution, to endure a small evil at the
moment, to avoid a greater hereafter.
Woman in particular, whose virtue[8] is built on mutable
prejudices,
seldom attains to this greatness of mind; so that, becoming the
slave of her own feelings, she is easily subjugated by those of
others. Thus degraded, her reason, her misty reason ! is employed
rather to burnish than to snap her chains.
Indignantly have I heard women argue in the same track as men, and
adopt the sentiments that brutalise them, with all the pertinacity
of ignorance.
I must illustrate my assertion by a few examples. Mrs. Piozzi, who
often repeated by rote, what she did not understand, comes forward
with Johnsonian periods.
"Seek not for happiness in singularity; and dread a refinement of
wisdom as-a deviation into folly." Thus she dogmatically addresses
a new married man; and to elucidate this pompous exordium, she
adds, " I said that the person of your lady would not grow more
pleasing to you, but pray let her never suspect that it grows less
so: that a woman will pardon an affront to her understanding much
sooner than one to her person, is well known; nor will any of us
contradict the assertion. All our attainments, all our arts, are
employed to gain and keep the heart of man; and what mortification
can exceed the disappointment, if the end be not obtained ? There
is no reproof however pointed, no punishment however severe, that
a woman of spirit will not prefer to neglect; and if she can endure
it without complaint, it only proves that she means to make herself
amends by the attention of others for the slights of her husband !"
These are truly masculine sentiments. "All our arts are employed to
gain and keep the heart of man:"--and what is the inference?--if
her person, and was there ever a person, though formed with
Medicean symmetry, that was not slighted ? be neglected, she will
make herself amends by endeavouring to please other men. Noble
morality! But thus is the understanding of the whole sex affronted,
and their virtue deprived of the common basis of virtue. A woman
must know, that her person cannot be as pleasing to her husband as
it was to her lover, and if she be offended with him for being a
human creature, she may as well whine about the loss of his heart
as about any other foolish thing. And this very want of discernment
or unreasonable anger, proves that he could not change his fondness
for her person into affection for her virtues or respect for her
understanding.
Whilst women avow, and act up to such opinions, their
understandings, at least, deserve the contempt and obloquy that
men, who never insult their persons, have pointedly levelled at the
female mind. And it is the sentiments of these polite men, who do
not wish to be encumbered with mind, that vain women thoughtlessly
adopt. Yet they should know, that insulted reason alone can spread
that sacred reserve about the person, which renders human
affections, for human affections have always some base alloy, as
permanent as is consistent with the grand end of existence--the
attainment of virtue.
The Baroness de Stael speaks the same language as the lady just
cited, with more enthusiasm. Her eulogium on Rousseau
was accidentally put into my hands and her sentiments, the
sentiments of too many of my sex, may serve as the text for a few
comments. "Though Rousseau," she observes, "has endeavoured to
prevent women from interfering in public affairs, and acting a
brilliant part in the theatre of politics; yet in speaking of them,
how much has he done it to their satisfaction ! If he wished to
deprive them of some rights foreign to their sex, how has he for
ever restored to them all those to which it has a claim! And in
attempting to diminish their influence over the deliberations of
men, how sacredly has he established the empire they have over
their happiness! In aiding them to descend from an usurped throne,
he has firmly seated them upon that to which they were destined by
nature; and though he be full of indignation against them when they
endeavour to resemble men, yet when they come before him with all
the charms, weaknesses, virtues, and errors of their sex, his
respect for their persons amounts almost to adoration." True! For
never was there a sensualist who paid more fervent adoration at the
shrine of beauty. So devout, indeed, was his respect for the
person, that excepting the virtue of chastity, for obvious reasons,
he only wished to see it embellished by charms, weaknesses, and
errors. He was afraid lest the austerity of reason should disturb
the soft playfulness of love. The master wished to have a
meretricious slave to fondle, entirely dependent on his reason and
bounty; he did not want a companion, whom he should be compelled to
esteem, or a friend to whom he could confine the care of his
children's education, should death deprive them of their father,
before he had fulfilled the sacred task. He denies woman reason,
shuts her out from knowledge, and turns her aside from truth; yet
his pardon is granted, because " he admits the passion of love." It
would require some ingenuity to show why women were to be under
such an obligation to him for thus admitting love; when it is clear
that he admits it only for the relaxation of men, and to perpetuate
the species; but he talked with passion, and that powerful spell
worked on the sensibility of a young encomiast. " What signifies
it," pursues this rhapsodist, " to women, that his reason disputes
with them the empire, when his heart is devotedly theirs," It is
not empire,--but equality, that they should contend for. Yet, if
they only wished to lengthen out their sway, they should not
entirely trust to their persons, for though beauty may gain a
heart, it cannot keep it, even while the beauty is in full bloom,
unless the mind lend, at least, some graces.
When women are once sufficiently enlightened to discover their real
interest, on a grand scale, they will, I am persuaded, be very
ready to resign all the prerogatives of love, that are not mutual,
speaking of them as lasting prerogatives, for the calm satisfaction
of friendship, and the tender confidence of habitual esteem. Before
marriage they will not assume any insolent airs, or afterwards
abjectly submit; but endeavouring to act like reasonable creatures,
in both situations, they will not be tumbled from a throne to a
stool.
Madame Genlis has written several entertaining books for children;
and her Letters on Education afford many useful hints, that
sensible parents will certainly avail themselves of; but her views
are narrow, and her prejudices as unreasonable as strong.
I shall pass over her vehement argument in favour of the eternity
of future punishments, because I blush to think that a human being
should ever argue vehemently in such a cause, and only make a few
remarks on her absurd manner of making the parental authority
supplant reason. For everywhere does she inculcate not only blind
submission to parents, but to the opinion of the world.[9]
She tells a story of a young man engaged by his father's express
desire to a girl of fortune. Before the marriage could take place
she is deprived of her fortune, and thrown friendless on the world.
The father practises the most infamous arts to separate his son
from her, and when the son detects his villainy, and, following the
dictates of honour, marries the girl, nothing but misery ensues,
because, forsooth! he married without his father's consent. On what
ground can religion or morality rest when justice is thus set at
defiance? With the same view she represents an accomplished young
woman, as ready to marry anybody that her mamma pleased to
recommend; and, as actually marrying the young man of her own
choice, without feeling any emotions of passion, because that a
well-educated girl had not time to be in love. Is it possible to
have much respect for a system of education that thus insults
reason and nature?
Many similar opinions occur in her writings, mixed with sentiments
that do honour to her head and heart. Yet so much superstition is
mixed with her religion, and so much worldly wisdom with her
morality, that I should not let a young person read her works,
unless I could afterwards converse on the subjects, and point out
the contradictions.
Mrs. Chapone's letters are written with such good sense and
unaffected humility, and contain so many useful observations, that
I only mention them to pay the worthy writer this tribute of
respect. I cannot, it is true, always coincide in opinion with her,
but I always respect her.
The very word respect brings Mrs. Macaulay to my remembrance. The
woman of the greatest abilities, undoubtedly, that this country has
ever produced; and yet this woman has been suffered to die without
sufficient respect being paid to her memory.
Posterity, however, will be more just, and remember that Catherine
Macaulay was an example of intellectual acquirements supposed to be
incompatible with the weakness of her sex. In her style of writing,
indeed, no sex appears, for it is like the sense it conveys, strong
and clear.
I will not call hers a masculine understanding, because I admit not
of such an arrogant assumption of reason; but I contend that it was
a sound one, and that her judgment, the matured fruit of profound
thinking, was a proof that a woman can acquire judgment in the full
extent of the word. Possessing more penetration than sagacity, more
understanding than fancy, she writes with sober energy and
argumentative closeness; yet sympathy and benevolence give an
interest to her sentiments, and that vital heat to arguments, which
forces the reader to weigh them.[10]
When I first thought of writing these strictures I anticipated Mrs.
Macaulay's approbation, with a little of that sanguine ardour which
it has been the business of my life to depress, but soon heard with
the sickly qualm-of disappointed hope, and the still seriousness of
regret--that she was no more!
SECTION V
Taking a view of the different works which have been written on
education, Lord Chesterfield's Letters must not be silently passed
over. Not that I mean to analyse his unmanly, immoral system, or
even to cull any of the useful, shrewd remarks which occur in his
epistles. No, I only mean to make a few reflections on the avowed
tendency of them, the art of acquiring an early knowledge of the
world--an art, I will venture to assert, that preys secretly, like
the worm in the bud, on the expanding powers, and turns to poison
the generous juices which should mount with vigour in the youthful
frame, inspiring warm affections and great resolves.[11]
For everything, saith the wise man, there is a season; and who
would look for the fruits of autumn during the genial months of
spring? But this is mere declamation, and I mean to reason with
those worldly-wise instructors, who, instead of cultivating the
judgment, instil prejudices, and render hard the heart that gradual
experience would only have cooled. An early acquaintance with human
infirmities; or, what is termed knowledge of the world, is the
surest way, in my opinion, to contract the heart and damp the
natural youthful ardour which produces not only great talents, but
great virtues. For the vain attempt to bring forth the fruit of
experience, before the sapling has out thrown its leaves, only
exhausts its strength, and prevents its assuming a natural form;
just as the form and strength of subsiding metals are injured when
the attraction of cohesion is disturbed.
Tell me, ye who have studied the human mind, is it not a strange
way to fix principles by showing young people that they are seldom
stable? And how can they be fortified by habits when they are
proved to be fallacious by example? Why is the ardour of youth thus
to be damped, and the luxuriancy of fancy cut to the quick? This
dry caution may, it is true, guard a character from worldly
mischances, but will infallibly preclude excellence in either
virtue or knowledge.[12] The stumbling-block thrown across every
path by suspicion will prevent any vigorous exertions of genius or
benevolence, and life will be stripped of its most alluring charm
long before its calm evening, when man would retire to
contemplation for comfort and support.
A young man who has been bred up with domestic friends, and led to
store his mind with as much speculative knowledge as can be
acquired by reading and the natural reflections which youthful
ebullitions of animal spirits and instinctive feelings inspire,
will enter the world with warm and erroneous expectations. But this
appears to be the course of Nature. and in morals, as well as in
works of taste, we should be observant of her sacred indications,
and not presume to lead when we ought obsequiously to follow.
In the world few act from principle; present feelings and early
habits are the grand springs; but how would the former be deadened,
and the latter rendered iron-corroding fetters, if the world were
shown to young people just as it is, when no knowledge of mankind
or their own hearts, slowly obtained by experience, rendered them
forbearing? Their fellow-creatures would not then be viewed as
frail beings like themselves, condemned to struggle with human
infirmities, and sometimes displaying the light, and sometimes the
dark, side of their character; extorting alternate feelings of love
and disgust, but guarded against as beasts of prey, till every
enlarged social feeling--in a word, humanity--was eradicated.
In life, on the contrary, as we gradually discover the
imperfections of our nature, we discover virtues, and various
circumstances attach us to our fellow-creatures, when we mix with
them and view the same objects, that are never thought of in
acquiring a hasty unnatural knowledge of the world. We see a folly
swell into a vice, by almost imperceptible degrees, and pity while
we blame; but if the hideous monster burst suddenly on our sight,
fear and disgust, rendering us more severe than man ought to be,
might lead us with blind zeal to usurp the character of
omnipotence, and denounce damnation on our fellow-mortals,
forgetting that we cannot read the heart, and that we have seeds of
the same vices lurking in our own.
I have already remarked that we expect more from instruction than
mere instruction can produce; for instead of preparing young people
to encounter the evils of life with dignity, and to acquire wisdom
and virtue by the exercise of their own [13] faculties, precepts
are heaped upon precepts, and blind obedience required when
conviction should be brought home to reason.
Suppose, for instance, that a young person, in the first ardour of
friendship, deifies the beloved object, what harm can arise from
this mistaken enthusiastic attachment? Perhaps it is necessary for
virtue first to appear in a human form to impress youthful hearts;
the ideal model, which a more matured and exalted mind looks up to,
and shapes for itself, would elude their sight. "He who loves not
his brother whom he hath seen, how can he love God?" asked the
wisest of men.
It is natural for youth to adorn the first object of its affection
with every good quality, and the emulation produced by ignorance,
or, to speak with more propriety, by inexperience, brings forward
the mind capable of forming such an affection, and when, in the
lapse of time, perfection is found not to be within the reach of
mortals, virtue, abstractedly, is thought beautiful, and wisdom
sublime. Admiration then gives place to friendship, properly so
called, because it is cemented by esteem; and the being walks alone
only dependent on Heaven for that emulous panting after perfection
which ever glows in a noble mind. But this knowledge a man must
gain by the exertion of his own faculties; and this is surely the
blessed fruit of disappointed hope! for He who delighteth to
diffuse happiness and show mercy to the weak creatures, who are
learning to know Him, never implanted a good propensity to be a
tormenting ignis fatuus.
Our trees are now allowed to spread with wild luxuriance, nor do we
expect by force to combine the majestic marks of time with youthful
graces; but wait patiently till they have struck deep their root,
and braved many a storm. Is the mind then, which, in proportion to
its dignity, advances more slowly towards perfection, to be treated
with less respect? To argue from analogy, everything around us is
in a progressive state; and when an unwelcome knowledge of life
produces almost a satiety of life, and we discover by the natural
course of things that all that is done under the sun is vanity, we
are drawing near the awful close of the drama. The days of activity
and hope are over, and the opportunities which the first stage of
existence has afforded of advancing in the scale of intelligence,
must soon be summed up. A knowledge at this period of the futility
of life, or earlier, if obtained by experience, is very useful,
because it is natural; but when a frail being is shown the follies
and vices of man, that he may be taught prudently to guard against
the common casualties of life by sacrificing his heart--surely it
is not speaking harshly to call it the wisdom of this world,
contrasted with the nobler fruit of piety and experience.
I will venture a paradox, and deliver my opinion without reserve;
if men were only born to form a circle of life and death, it would
be wise to take every step that foresight could suggest to render
life happy. Moderation in every pursuit would then be supreme
wisdom; and the prudent voluptuary might enjoy a degree of content,
though he neither cultivated his understanding nor kept his heart
pure. Prudence, supposing we were mortal, would be true wisdom, or,
to be more explicit, would procure the greatest portion of
happiness, considering the whole of life, but knowledge beyond the
conveniences of life would be a curse.
Why should we injure our health by close study? The exalted
pleasure which intellectual pursuits afford would scarcely be
equivalent to the hours of languor that follow; especially, if it
be necessary to take into the reckoning the doubts and
disappointments that cloud our researches. Vanity and vexation
close every inquiry: for the cause which we particularly wished to
discover flies like the horizon before us as we advance. The
ignorant, on the contrary, resemble children, and suppose, that if
they could walk straight forward they should at last arrive where
the earth and clouds meet. Yet, disappointed as we are in our
researches, the mind gains strength by the exercise, sufficient,
perhaps, to comprehend the answers which, in another step of
existence, it may receive to the anxious questions it asked, when
the understanding with feeble wing was fluttering round the visible
effects to dive into the hidden cause.
The passions also, the winds of life, would be useless, if not
injurious, did the substance which composes our thinking being,
after we have thought in vain, only become the support of vegetable
life, and invigorate a cabbage, or blush in a rose. The appetites
would answer every earthly purpose, and produce more moderate and
permanent happiness. But the powers of the soul that are of little
use here, and, probably, disturb our animal enjoyments, even while
conscious dignity makes us glory in possessing them, prove that
life is merely an education, a state of infancy, to which the only
hopes worth cherishing should not be sacrificed. I mean, therefore,
to infer, that we ought to have a precise idea of what we wish to
attain by education, for the immortality of the soul is
contradicted by the actions of many people who firmly profess the
belief.
If you mean to secure ease and prosperity on earth as the first
consideration, and leave futurity to provide for itself; you act
prudently in giving your child an early insight into the weaknesses
of his nature. You may not, it is true, make an Inkle of him; but
do not imagine that he will stick to more than the letter of the
law, who has very early imbibed a mean opinion of human nature; nor
will he think it necessary to rise much above the common standard.
He may avoid gross vices, because honesty is the best policy; but
he will never aim at attaining great virtues. The example of
writers and artists will illustrate this remark.
I must therefore venture to doubt whether what has been thought an
axiom in morals may not have been a dogmatical assertion made by
men who have coolly seen mankind through the medium of books, and
say, in direct contradiction to them, that the regulation of the
passions is not, always, wisdom. on the contrary, it should seem,
that one reason why men have superior judgment, and more fortitude
than women, is undoubtedly this, that they give a freer scope to
the grand passions, and by more frequently going astray enlarge
their minds. If then by the exercise of their own reason they fix
on some stable principle, they have probably to thank the force of
their passions, nourished by false views of life, and permitted to
overleap the boundary that secures content. But if, in the dawn of
life, we could soberly survey the scenes before as in perspective,
and see everything in its true colours, how could the passions gain
sufficient strength to unfold the faculties?
Let me now as from an eminence survey the world stripped of all its
false delusive charms. The clear atmosphere enables me to see each
object in its true point of view, while my heart is still. I am
calm as the prospect in a morning when the mists, slowly
dispersing, silently unveil the beauties of nature, refreshed by
rest.
In what light will the world now appear? I rub my eyes, and think,
perchance, that I am just awaking from a lively dream.
I see the sons and daughters of men pursuing shadows, and anxiously
wasting their powers to feed passions which have no adequate
object. If the very excess of these blind impulses, pampered by
that lying, yet constantly trusted guide, the imagination, did not,
by preparing them for some other state, render short-sighted
mortals wiser without their own concurrence, or, what comes to the
same thing, when pursuing some imaginary present good.
After viewing objects in this light, it would not be fanciful to
imagine that this world was a stage on which a pantomime is daily
performed for the amusement of superior beings. How would they be
diverted to see the ambitious man consuming himself by running
after a phantom, and "pursuing the bubble fame in the cannon's
mouth" that was to blow him to nothing; for when consciousness is
lost, it matters not whether we mount in a whirlwind, or descend in
rain. And should they compassionately invigorate his sight, and
show him the thorny path which led to eminence, that, like a
quicksand, sinks as he ascends, disappointing his hopes when almost
within his grasp, would he not leave to others the honour of
amusing them, and labour to secure the present moment, though, from
the constitution of his nature, he would not find it very easy to
catch the flying stream? Such slaves are we to hope and fear!
But vain as the ambitious man's pursuits would be, he is often
striving for something more substantial than fame. That, indeed,
would be the veriest meteor, the wildest fire that could lure a man
to ruin. What! renounce the most trifling gratification to be
applauded when he should be no more! Wherefore this struggle,
whether man be mortal or immortal, if that noble passion did not
really raise the being above his fellows?
And love! What diverting scenes would it produce; pantaloon's
tricks must yield to more egregious folly. To see a mortal adorn an
object with imaginary charms, and then fall down and worship the
idol which he had himself set up--how ridiculous But what serious
consequences ensue to rob man of that portion of happiness which
the Deity by calling him into existence has (or on what can His
attributes rest?) indubitably promised. Would not all the purposes
of life have been much better fulfilled if he had only felt what
has been termed physical love? And would not the sight of the
object, not seen through the medium of the imagination, soon reduce
the passion to an appetite if reflection, the noble distinction of
man, did not give it force, and make it an instrument to raise him
above this earthly dross, by teaching him to love the centre of all
perfection, whose wisdom appears clearer and clearer in the works
of nature in proportion as reason is illuminated and exalted by
contemplation, and by acquiring that love of order which the
struggles of passion produce?
The habit of reflection, and the knowledge attained by fostering
any passion, might be shown to be equally useful, though the object
be proved equally fallacious; for they would all appear in the same
light if they were not magnified by the governing passion implanted
in us by the Author of all good to call forth and strengthen the
faculties of each individual, and enable it to attain all the
experience that an infant can obtain who does certain things, it
cannot tell why.
I descend from my height, and mixing with my fellow-creatures feel
myself hurried along the common stream. Ambition, love, hope, and
fear, exert their wonted power, though we be convinced by reason
that their present and most attractive promises are only lying
dreams; but had the cold hand of circumspection damped each
generous feeling before it had left any permanent character, or
fixed some habit, what could be expected but selfish prudence and
reason just rising above instinct? Who that has read Dean Swift's
disgusting description of the Yahoos, and insipid one of Houyhnhnm
with a philosophical eye, can avoid seeing the futility of
degrading the passions, or making man rest in contentment?
The youth should act, for had he the experience of a grey head he
would be fitter for death than life, though his virtues, rather
residing in his head than his heart, could produce nothing great,
and his understanding, prepared for this world, would not, by its
noble flights, prove that it had a title to a better.
Besides, it is not possible to give a young person a just view of
life; he must have struggled with his own passions before he can
estimate the force of the temptation which betrayed his brother
into vice. Those who are entering life, and those who are
departing, see the world from such very different points of view
that they can seldom think alike, unless the unfledged reason of
the former never attempted a solitary flight.
When we hear of some daring crime, it comes full on us in the
deepest shade of turpitude, and raises indignation; but the eye
that gradually saw the darkness thicken must observe it with more
compassionate forbearance. The world cannot be seen by an unmoved
spectator; we must mix in the throng, and feel as men feel, before
we can judge of their feelings. If we mean, in short, to live in
the world, to grow wiser and better, and not merely to enjoy the
good things of life, we must attain a knowledge of others at the
same time that we become acquainted with ourselves. Knowledge
acquired any other way only hardens the heart, and perplexes the
understanding.
I may be told that the knowledge thus acquired is sometimes
purchased at too dear a rate. I can only answer that I very much
doubt whether any knowledge can be attained without labour and
sorrow; and those who wish to spare their children both should not
complain if they are neither wise nor virtuous. They only aimed at
making them prudent, and prudence early in life is but the cautious
craft of ignorant self-love.
I have observed that young people, to whose education particular
attention has been paid, have in general been very superficial and
conceited, and far from pleasing in any respect, because they had
neither the unsuspecting warmth of youth, nor the cool depth of
age. I cannot help imputing this unnatural appearance principally
to that hasty premature instruction which leads them presumptuously
to repeat all the crude notions they have taken upon trust, so that
the careful education which they received, makes them all their
lives the slaves of prejudices.
Mental as well as bodily exertion is at first irksome; so much so,
that the many would fain let others both work and think for them.
An observation which I have often made will illustrate my meaning.
When in a circle of strangers or acquaintances a person of moderate
abilities asserts an opinion with heat, I will venture to affirm--
for I have traced this fact home' --very often that it is a
prejudice. These echoes have a high respect for the understanding
of some relation or friend, and without fully comprehending the
opinions which they are so eager to retail, they maintain them with
a degree of obstinacy that would surprise even the person who
concocted them.
I know that a kind of fashion now prevails of respecting
prejudices; and when anyone dares to face them, though actuated by
humanity and armed by reason, he is superciliously asked whether
his ancestors were fools. No, I should reply. opinions at first of
every description were all probably considered, and therefore were
founded on some reason; yet not unfrequently, of course, it was
rather a local expedient than a fundamental principle that would be
reasonable at all times. But moss-covered opinions assume the
disproportioned form of prejudices when they are indolently adopted
only because age has given them a venerable aspect, though the
reason on which they were built ceases to be a reason, or cannot be
traced. Why are we to love prejudices merely because they are
prejudices?[14] A prejudice is a fond obstinate persuasion for
which we can give no reason; for the moment a reason can be given
for an opinion, it ceases to be a prejudice, though it may be an
error in judgment; and are we then advised to cherish opinions only
to set reason at defiance? This mode of arguing, if arguing it may
be called, reminds me of what is vulgarly termed a woman's reason;
for women sometimes declare that they love, or believe certain
things, because they love or believe them.
It is impossible to converse with people to any purpose who only
use affirmatives and negatives. Before you can bring them to a
point to start fairly from, you must go back to the simple
principles that were antecedent to the prejudices broached by
power; and it is ten to one but you are stopped by the
philosophical assertion that certain principles are as practically
false as they are abstractly true.[15] Nay, it may be inferred that
reason has whispered some doubts, for it generally happens that
people assert their opinions with the greatest heat when they begin
to waver; striving to drive out their own doubts by convincing
their opponent, they grow angry when those gnawing doubts are
thrown back to prey on themselves.
The fact is, that men expect from education, what education cannot
give. A sagacious parent or tutor may strengthen the body and
sharpen the instruments by which the child is to gather knowledge;
but the honey must be the reward of the individual's own industry.
It is almost as absurd to attempt to make a youth wise by the
experience of another, as to expect the body to grow strong by the
exercise which is only talked of, or seen.[16] Many of those
children whose conduct has been most narrowly watched, become the
weakest men, because their instructors only instil certain notions
into their minds, that have no other foundation than their
authority; and if they be loved or respected, the mind is cramped
in its exertions and wavering in its advances. The business of
education in this case, is only to conduct the shooting tendrils to
a proper pole; yet after laying precept upon precept, without
allowing a child to acquire judgment itself, parents expect them to
act in the same manner by this borrowed fallacious light, as if
they had illuminated it themselves; and be, when they enter life,
what their parents are at the close. They do not consider that the
tree, and even the human body, does not strengthen its fibres till
it has reached its full growth.
There appears to be something analogous in the mind. The senses and
the imagination give a form to the character, during childhood and
youth; and the understanding, as life advances, gives firmness to
the first fair purposes of sensibility, till virtue, arising rather
from the clear conviction of reason than the impulse of the heart,
morality is made to rest on a rock against which the storms of
passion vainly beat.
I hope I shall not be misunderstood when I say, that religion will
not have this condensing energy, unless it be founded on reason. If
it be merely the refuge of weakness or wild fanaticism, and not a
governing principle of conduct, drawn from self-knowledge, and a
rational opinion respecting the attributes of God, what can it be
expected to produce? The religion which consists in warming the
affections, and exalting the imagination, is only the poetical
part, and may afford the individual pleasure without rendering it
a more moral being. It may be a substitute for worldly pursuits;
yet narrow, instead of enlarging the heart: but virtue must be
loved as in itself sublime and excellent, and not for the
advantages it procures or the evils. it averts, if any great degree
of excellence be expected. Men will not become moral when they only
build airy castles in a future world to compensate for the
disappointments which they meet with in this; if they turn their
thoughts from relative duties to religious reveries.
Most prospects in life are marred by the shuffling worldly wisdom
of men, who, forgetting that they cannot serve God and mammon,
endeavour to blend contradictory things. If you wish to make your
son rich, pursue one course if you are only anxious to make him
virtuous, you must not imagine that you can bound from one road to
the other without losing your way.[17]
NOTES
[1] I have already inserted the passage, p.44.
[2] What nonsense!
[3] What is to the consequence, if the mother's and husband's
opinion should chance not to agree? An ignorant person cannot be
reasoned out of an error -- and when persuaded to give up one
prejudice for another the mind is unsettled. Indeed, the husband
may not have any religion to teach her, though in such a situation
she will be in great want of a support to her virtue, independent
of worldly considerations.
[4] Rousseau's Emilius.
[5] Can you? -- Can you? would be the most emphatical comment,
were it drawled out in a whining voice.
[6] Let women once acquire good sense -- and if it deserve the
name, it will teach them; or, of what use will it be? how to employ
it.
[7] "He is the free man, whom the truth makes free!" -- Cowper.
[8] I mean to use a word that comprehends more than chastity, the
sexual virtue.
[9] A person is not to act in this or that way, though convinced
they are right in so doing, because some equivocal circumstances
may lead the world to suspect that they acted from different
motives. This is sacrificing the substance for a shadow. Let people
by watch their own hearts, and act rightly, as far as they can
judge, and they may patiently wait till the opinion of the world
comes round. It is best to be directed by a simple motive, for
justice has too often been sacrificed to propriety -- another word
for convenience.
[10] Coinciding in opinion with Mrs. Macauly relative to many
branches of education, I refer to her valuable work, instead of
quoting her sentiments to support my own.
[11] That children ought to be constantly guarded against the vices
and follies of the world appears to me a very mistaken opinion; for
in the course of my experience, and my eyes have looked abroad, I
newer knew a youth educated in this manner, who had earlt imbibed
these chilling suspicions, and repeated by rote the hesitating if
of age, that did not prove a selfish character.
[12] I have already observed that an early knowledge of the world,
obtained in a natural way, by mixing in the world, has the same
effect, instancing officers and women.
[13] "I find that all is but lip-wisdom which want experience,"
says Sidney.
[14] Vide Mr. Burke.
[15] "Convince a man against his will,
He's of the same opinion still."
[16] 'One sees nothing when one is content to contemplate only: it
is necessary to act oneself to be able to see how others act." --
Rousseau.
[17] see an excellent essay on this subject by Mrs. Barbauld, in
Miscellaneous Pieces in Prose.
CHAPTER VI
THE EFFECT WHICH AN EARLY ASSOCIATION OF IDEAS
HAS UPON THE CHARACTER
Educated in the enervating style recommended by the writers on whom
I have been animadverting; and not having a chance, from their
subordinate state in society, to recover their lost ground, is it
surprising that women everywhere appear a defect in nature? Is it
surprising, when we consider what a determinate effect an early
association of ideas has on the character, that they neglect their
understandings, and turn all their attention to their persons?
The great advantages which naturally result from storing the mind
with knowledge, are obvious from the following considerations. The
association of our ideas is either habitual or instantaneous; and
the latter mode seems rather to depend on the original temperature
of the mind than on the will. When the ideas, and matters of fact,
are once taken in, they lie by for use, till some fortuitous
circumstance makes the information dart into the mind with
illustrative force, that has been received at very different
periods of our lives. Like the lightning's flash are many
recollections; one idea assimilating and explaining another, with
astonishing rapidity. I do not now allude to that quick perception
of truth, which is so intuitive that it baffles research, and makes
us at a loss to determine whether it is reminiscence or
ratiocination, lost sight of in its celerity, that opens the dark
cloud. Over those instantaneous associations we have little power;
for when the mind is once enlarged by excursive flights, or
profound reflection, the raw materials will, in some degree,
arrange themselves. The understanding, it is true, may keep us from
going out of drawing when we group our thoughts, or transcribe from
the imagination the warm sketches of fancy; but the animal spirits,
the individual character, give the colouring. Over this subtile
electric fluid,[1] how little power do we possess, and over it how
little power can reason obtain. These fine intractable spirits
appear to be the essence of genius, and beaming in its eagle eye,
produce in the most eminent degree the happy energy of associating
thoughts that surprise, delight, and instruct These are the glowing
minds that concentrate pictures for their fellow-creatures; forcing
them to view with interest the objects reflected from the
impassioned imagination, which they passed over in nature.
I must be allowed to explain myself. The generality of people
cannot see or feel poetically, they want fancy, and therefore fly
from solitude in search of sensible objects; but when an author
lends them his eyes they can see as he saw, and be amused by images
they could not select, though lying before them.
Education thus only supplies the man of genius with knowledge to
give variety and contrast to his associations; but there is an
habitual association of ideas, that grows "with our growth," which
has a great effect on the moral character of mankind, and by which
a turn is given to the mind that commonly remains throughout life.
So ductile is the understanding, and yet so stubborn, that the
associations which depend on adventitious circumstances, during the
period that the body takes to arrive at maturity, can seldom be
disentangled by reason. one idea calls up another, its old
associate, and memory, faithful to the first impressions,
particularly when the intellectual powers are not employed to cool
our sensations, retraces them with mechanical exactness.
This habitual slavery, to first impressions, has a more baneful
effect on the female than the male character, because business and
other dry employments of the understanding, tend to deaden the
feelings and break associations that do violence to reason. But
females, who are made women of when they are mere children, and
brought back to childhood when they ought to leave the go-cart for
ever, have not sufficient strength of mind to efface the
superinductions of art that have smothered nature.
Everything that they see or hear serves to fix impressions, call
forth emotions, and associate ideas, that give a sexual character
to the mind. False notions of beauty and delicacy stop the growth
of their limbs and produce a sickly soreness, rather than delicacy
of organs; and thus weakened by being employed in unfolding instead
of examining the first associations, forced on them by every
surrounding object, how can they attain the vigour necessary to
enable them to throw off their factitious character?--where find
strength to recur to reason and rise superior to a system of
oppression, that blasts the fair promises of spring? This cruel
association of ideas, which everything conspires to twist into all
their habits of thinking, or, to speak with more precision, of
feeling, receives new force when they begin to act a little for
themselves; for they then perceive that it is only through their
address to excite emotions in men, that pleasure and power are to
be obtained. Besides, the books professedly written for their
instruction, which make the first impression on their minds, all
inculcate the same opinions. Educated then in worse than Egyptian
bondage, it is unreasonable, as well as cruel, to upbraid them with
faults that can scarcely be avoided, unless a degree of native
vigour be supposed, that falls to the lot of very few amongst
mankind.
For instance, the severest sarcasms have been levelled against the
sex, and they have been ridiculed for repeating "a set of phrases
learnt by rote," when nothing could be more natural, considering
the education they receive, and that their "highest praise is to
obey, unargued"--the will of man. If they be not allowed to have
reason sufficient to govern their own conduct --why, all they learn
must be learned by rote! And when all their ingenuity is called
forth to adjust their dress, "a passion for a scarlet coat," is so
natural, that it never surprised me; and, allowing Pope's summary
of their character to be just, "that every woman is at heart a
rake," why should they be bitterly censured for seeking a congenial
mind, and preferring a rake to a man of sense?
Rakes know how to work on their sensibility, whilst the modest
merit of reasonable men has, of course, less effect on their
feelings, and they cannot reach the heart by the way of the
understanding, because they have few sentiments in common.
It seems a little absurd to expect women to be more reasonable than
men in their likings, and still to deny them the uncontrolled use
of reason. When do men fall in love with sense? When do they, with
their superior powers and advantages, turn from the person to the
mind? And how can they then expect women, who are only taught to
observe behaviour, and acquire manners rather than morals, to
despise what they have been all their lives labouring to attain?
Where are they suddenly to find judgment enough to weigh patiently
the sense of an awkward virtuous man, when his manners, of which
they are made critical judges, are rebuffing, and his conversation
cold and dull, because it does not consist of pretty repartees, or
well-turned compliments? In order to admire or esteem anything for
a continuance, we must, at least, have our curiosity excited by
knowing, in some degree, what we admire; for we are unable to
estimate the value of qualities and virtues above our
comprehension. Such a respect, when it is felt, may be very
sublime; and the confused consciousness of humility may render the
dependent creature an interesting object, in some points of view;
but human love must have grosser ingredients; and the person very
naturally will come in for its share--and, an ample share it mostly
has!
Love is, in a great degree, an arbitrary passion, and will reign,
like some other stalking mischiefs, by its own authority, without
deigning to reason; and it may also be easily distinguished from
esteem, the foundation of friendship, because it is o.'ten excited
by evanescent beauties and graces, though, to give an energy to the
sentiment, son deepen their impression and set the make the most
fair--the first good.
Common passions are excited by look for beauty and the simper of
women are captivated by easy manners; a gentleman-like man seldom
fails to please them, and their thirsty ears eagerly drink the
insinuating nothings of politeness, whilst they turn from the
unintelligible sounds of the charmer--reason, charm he never so
wisely. With respect to superficial accomplishments, the rake
certainly has the advantage; and of these females can form an
opinion, for it is their own ground. Rendered gay and giddy by the
whole tenor of their lives, the very aspect of wisdom, or the
severe graces of virtue, must have a lugubrious appearance to them;
and produce a kind of restraint from which they and love, sportive
child, naturally revolt. Without taste, excepting of the lighter
kind, for taste is the offspring of judgment, how can they discover
that true beauty and grace must arise from the play of the mind?
and how can they be expected to relish in a lover what they do not,
or very imperfectly, possess themselves? The sympathy that unites
hearts, and invites to confidence, in them is so very faint, that
it cannot take fire, and thus mount to passion. No, I repeat it,
the love cherished by such minds, must have grosser fuel!
The inference is obvious; till women are led to exercise their
understandings, they should not be satirised for their attachment
to rakes; or even for being rakes at heart, when it appears to be
the inevitable consequence of their education. They who live to
please--must find their enjoyments, their happiness, in pleasure!
It is a trite, yet true remark, that we never do anything well,
unless we love it for its own sake.
Supposing, however, for a moment, that women were, in some future
revolution of time, to become, what I sincerely wish them to be,
even love would acquire more serious dignity, and be purified in
its own fires; and virtue giving true delicacy to their affections,
they would turn with disgust from a rake. Reasoning then, as well
as feeling, the only province of woman, at present, they might
easily guard against exterior graces, and quickly learn to despise
the sensibility that had been ex- cited and hackneyed in the ways
of women, whose trade was vice; and allurements, wanton airs. They
would recollect that the flame, one must use appropriated
expressions, which they wished to light up, had been exhausted by
lust, and that the sated appetite, losing all relish for pure and
simple pleasures, could only be roused by licentious arts or
variety. What satisfaction could a woman of delicacy promise
herself in a union with such a man, when the very artlessness of
her affection might appear insipid? Thus does Dryden describe the
situation,
Where love is duty, on the female side,
On theirs mere sensual gust, and sought with surly pride.
But one grand truth women have yet to learn, though much it imports
them to act accordingly. In the choice of a husband, they should
not be led astray by the qualities of a lover--for a lover the
husband, even supposing him to be wise and virtuous, cannot long
remain.
Were women more rationally educated, could they take a more
comprehensive view of things, they would be contented to love but
once in their lives; and after marriage calmly let passion subside
into friendship--into that tender intimacy, which is the best
refuge from care; yet is built on such pure, still affections, that
idle jealousies would not be allowed to disturb the discharge of
the sober duties of life, or to engross the thoughts that ought to
be otherwise employed. This is a state in which many men live; but
few, very few, women. And the difference may easily be accounted
for, without recurring to a sexual character. Men, for whom we are
told women were made, have too much occupied the thoughts of women;
and this association has so entangled love with all their motives
of action; and, to harp a little on an old string, having been
solely employed either to prepare themselves to excite love, or
actually putting their lessons in practice, they cannot live
without love. But, when a sense of duty, or fear of shame, obliges
them to restrain this pampered desire of pleasing beyond certain
lengths, too far for delicacy, it is true, though far from
criminality, they obstinately determine to love, I speak of the
passion, their husbands to the end of the chapter--and then acting
the part which they foolishly exacted from their lovers, they
become abject wooers and fond slaves.
Men of wit and fancy are often rakes; and fancy is the food of
love. Such men will inspire passion. Half the sex, in its present
infantine state, would pine for a Lovelace; a man so witty, so
graceful, and so valiant: and can they deserve blame for acting
according to principles so constantly inculcated? They want a
lover, and protector; and behold him kneeling before them--bravery
prostrate to beauty! The virtues of a husband are thus thrown by
love into the background, and gay hopes, or lively emotions, banish
reflection till the day of reckoning come; and come it surely will,
to turn the sprightly lover into a surly suspicious tyrant, who
contemptuously insults the very weakness he fostered. or, supposing
the rake reformed, he cannot quickly get rid of old habits. When a
man of abilities is first carried away by his passions, it is
necessary that sentiment and taste varnish the enormities of vice,
and give a zest to brutal indulgences; but when the gloss of
novelty is worn off, and pleasure palls upon the sense,
lasciviousness becomes barefaced, and enjoyment only the desperate
effort of weakness flying from reflection as from a legion of
devils. Oh! virtue, thou art not an empty name! All that life can
give--thou givest!
If much comfort cannot be expected from the friendship of a
reformed rake of superior abilities, what is the consequence when
he lacketh sense, as well as principles? Verily misery, in its most
hideous shape. When the habits of weak people are consolidated by
time, a reformation is barely possible; and actually makes the
beings miserable who have not sufficient mind to be amused by
innocent pleasure; like the tradesman who retires from the hurry of
business, Nature presents to them only a universal blank; and the
restless thoughts prey on the damped spirits.[2] The reformation,
as well as his retirement, actually makes them wretched, because it
deprives them of all employment, by quenching the hopes and fears
that set in motion their sluggish minds.
If such be the force of habit; if such be the bondage of folly, how
carefully ought we to guard the mind from storing up vicious
associations; and equally careful should we be to cultivate the
understanding, to save the poor wight from the weak dependent state
of even harmless ignorance. For it is the right use of reason alone
which make us independent of everything--excepting the unclouded
reason--"Whose service is perfect freedom."
NOTES
[1] I have sometimes, when inclined to laugh at materialists,
asked whether, as the most powerful effects in nature are
apparently produced by fluids, the magnetic, etc., the passions
might not be fine volatile fluids that embraced humanity, keeping
the more refractory elementary parts together -- or whether they
were simply a liquid fire that pervaded the more sluggish
materials, giving them life and heat?
[2] I have frequently seen this exemplified in women whose beauty
could no longer be repaired. They have retired from the noisy
scenes of dissipation; but unless they became Methodists, the
solitude of the select society of their family connections or
acquaintance, has presented only a fearful void; consequently,
nervous complaints, and all the vapourish train of idleness,
rendered them quite as useless, and far more unhappy than when they
joined the giddy throng.
CHAPTER VII
MODESTY--COMPREHENSIVELY CONSIDERED, AND NOT
AS A SEXUAL VIRTUE
Modesty! sacred offspring of sensibility and reason!--true
delicacy of mind!--may I unblamed presume to investigate thy
nature, and trace to its covert the mild charm, that mellowing each
harsh feature of a character, renders what would otherwise only
inspire cold admiration--lovely! Thou that smoothest the wrinkles
of wisdom, and softenest the tone of the sublimest virtues till
they all melt into humanity; thou that spreadest the ethereal cloud
that, surrounding love, heightens every beauty, it half shades,
breathing those coy sweets that steal into the heart, and charm the
senses-- modulate for me the language of persuasive reason, till I
rouse my sex from the flowery bed, on which they supinely sleep
life away!
In speaking of the association of our ideas, I have noticed two
distinct modes; and in defining modesty, it appears to me equally
proper to discriminate that purity of mind, which is the effect of
chastity, from a simplicity of character that leads us to form a
just opinion of ourselves, equally distant from vanity or
presumption, though by no means incompatible with a lofty
consciousness of our own dignity. Modesty, in the latter
signification of the term, is that soberness of mind which teaches
a man not to think more highly of himself than he ought to think,
and should be distinguished from humility, because humility is a
kind of self-abasement.
A modest man often conceives a great plan, and tenaciously adheres
to it, conscious of his own strength, till success gives it a
sanction that determines its character. Milton was not arrogant
when he suffered a suggestion of judgment to escape him that proved
a prophecy; nor was General Washington when he accepted of the
command of the American forces. The latter has always been
characterised as a modest man; but had he been merely humble, he
would probably have shrunk back irresolute, afraid of trusting to
himself the direction of an enterprise, on which so much depended.
A modest man is steady, an humble man timid, and a vain one
presumptuous: this is the judgment, which the observation of many
characters, has led me to form. Jesus Christ was modest, Moses was
humble, and Peter vain.
Thus, discriminating modesty from humility in one case, I do not
mean to confound it with bashfulness in the other. Bashfulness, in
fact, is so distinct from modesty, that the most bashful lass or
raw country lout, often become the most impudent; for their
bashfulness being merely the instinctive timidity of ignorance,
custom soon changes it into assurance.[1]
The shameless behaviour of the prostitutes, who infest the streets
of this metropolis, raising alternate emotions of pity and disgust,
may serve to illustrate this remark. They trample on virgin
bashfulness with a sort of bravado, and glorifying in their shame,
become more audaciously lewd than men, however depraved, to whom
this sexual quality has not been gratuitously granted, ever appear
to be. But these poor ignorant wretches never had any modesty to
lose, when they consigned themselves to infamy; for modesty is a
virtue, not a quality. No, they were only bashful, shamefaced
innocents; and losing their innocence, their shamefacedness was
rudely brushed off: a virtue would have left some vestiges in the
mind, had it been sacrificed to passion, to make us respect the
grand ruin.
Purity of mind, or that genuine delicacy, which is the only
virtuous support of chastity, is near akin to that refinement of
humanity, which never resides in any but cultivated minds. It is
something nobler than innocence, it is the delicacy of reflection,
and not the coyness of ignorance. The reserve of reason, which,
like habitual cleanliness, is seldom seen in any great degree,
unless the soul is active, may easily be distinguished from rustic
shyness or wanton skittishness; and, so far from being incompatible
with knowledge, it is its fairest fruit. What a gross idea of
modesty had the writer of the following remark!--"The lady who
asked the question whether women may be instructed in the modern
system of botany consistently with female delicacy? was accused of
ridiculous prudery; nevertheless, if she had proposed the question
to me, I should certainly have answered--they cannot." Thus is the
fair book of knowledge to be shut with an everlasting seal! on
reading similar passages I have reverentially lifted up my eyes and
heart to Him who liveth for ever and ever, and said, "O, my Father,
hast Thou, by the very constitution of her nature forbid Thy child
to seek Thee in the fair forms of truth? And can her soul be
sullied by the knowledge that awfully calls her to Thee?"
I have then philosophically pursued these reflections till I
inferred that those women who have most improved their reason must
have the most modesty, though a dignified sedateness of deportment
may have succeeded the playful, bewitching bashfulness of youth.[2]
And thus have I argued. To render chastity the virtue from which
unsophisticated modesty will naturally flow, the attention should
be called away from employments which only exercise the
sensibility, and the heart made to beat time to humanity rather
than to throb with love. The woman who has dedicated a considerable
portion of her time to pursuits purely intellectual, and whose
affections have been exercised by humane plans of usefulness, must
have more purity of mind, as a natural consequence, than the
ignorant beings whose time and thoughts have been occupied by gay
pleasures, or schemes to conquer hearts.[3] The regulation of the
behaviour is not modesty, though those who study rules of decorum
are in general termed modest women. Make the heart clean; let it
expand and feel for all that is human, instead of being narrowed by
selfish passions; and let the mind frequently contemplate subjects
that exercise the understanding, without heating the imagination,
and artless modesty will give the finishing touches to the picture.
She who can discern the dawn of immortality in the streaks that
shoot athwart the misty night of ignorance, promising a clearer
day, will respect, as a sacred temple, the body that enshrines such
an improvable soul. True love likewise spreads this kind of
mysterious sanctity round the beloved object, making the lover most
modest when in her presence.[4] So reserved is affection that,
receiving or returning personal endearments, it wishes not only to
shun the human eye, as a kind of profanation, but to diffuse an
encircling cloudy obscurity to shut out even the saucy sparkling
sunbeams. Yet that affection does not deserve the epithet of chaste
which docs not receive a sublime gloom of tender melancholy, that
allows the mind for a moment to stand still and enjoy the present
satisfaction, when a consciousness of the Divine presence is
felt--for this must ever be the food of joy.
As I have always been fond of tracing to its source in nature any
prevailing custom, I have frequently thought that it was a
sentiment of affection for whatever had touched the person of an
absent or lost friend, which gave birth to that respect for relics,
so much abused by selfish priests. Devotion or love may be allowed
to hallow the garments as well as the person, for the lover must
want fancy who has not a sort of sacred respect for the glove or
slipper of his mistress. He could not confound them with vulgar
things of the same kind. This fine sentiment perhaps would not bear
to be analysed by the experimental philosopher. But of such stuff
is human rapture made up. A shadowy phantom glides before us,
obscuring every other object; yet when the soft cloud is grasped,
the form melts into common air, leaving a solitary void, or sweet
perfume, stolen from the violet, that memory long holds dear. But
I have tripped unawares on fairy ground, feeling the balmy gale of
spring stealing on me, though November frowns.
As a sex, women are more chaste than men; and as modesty is the
effect of chastity, they may deserve to have this virtue ascribed
to them in rather an appropriated sense. Yet I must be allowed to
add an hesitating if, for I doubt whether chastity will produce
modesty, though it may propriety of conduct, when it is merely a
respect for the opinion of the world,[5] and when coquetry and the
lovelorn tales of novelists employ the thoughts. Nay, from
experience and reason, I should be led to expect to meet with more
modesty amongst men than women, simply because men exercise their
understandings more than women.
But with respect to propriety of behaviour, excepting one class of
females, women have evidently the advantage. What can be more
disgusting than that impudent dross of gallantry thought so manly,
which makes many men stare insultingly at every female they meet?
Can it be termed respect for the sex? No, this loose behaviour
shows such habitual depravity, such weakness of mind, that it is
vain to expect much public or private virtue till both men and
women grow more modest--till men, curbing a sensual fondness for
the sex, or an affectation of manly assurance--more properly
speaking, impudence--treat each other with respect, unless appetite
or passion give the tone, peculiar to it, to their behaviour. I
mean every personal respect--the modest respect of humanity and
fellow-feeling--not the libidinous mockery of gallantry, nor the
insolent condescension of protectorship.
To carry the observation still further, modesty must heartily
disclaim, and refuse to dwell with that debauchery of mind, which
leads a man coolly to bring forward, without a blush, indecent
allusions, or obscene witticisms, in the presence of a
fellow-creature; women are now out of the question, for then it is
brutality. Respect for man, as man, is the foundation of every
noble sentiment. How much more modest is the libertine who obeys
the call of appetite or fancy than the lewd joker who sets the
table in a roar!
This is one of the many instances in which the sexual distinction
respecting modesty has proved fatal to virtue and happiness It is,
however, carried still further, and woman--weak woman--made by her
education the slave of sensibility, is required, on the most trying
occasions, to resist that sensibility. "Can anything," says Knox,
"be more absurd than keeping women in a state of ignorance, and yet
so vehemently to insist on their resisting temptation?" Thus when
virtue or honour make it proper to check a passion, the burden is
thrown on the weaker shoulders, contrary to reason and true
modesty, which at least should render the self-denial mutual, to
say nothing of the generosity of bravery, supposed to be a manly
virtue.
In the same strain runs Rousseau's and Dr. Gregory's advice
respecting modesty, strangely miscalled! for they both desire a
wife to leave it in doubt whether sensibility or weakness led her
to her husband's arms. The woman is immodest who can let the shadow
of such a doubt remain in her husband's mind a moment.
But, to state the subject in a different light, the want of
modesty, which I principally deplore as subversive of morality,
arises from the state of warfare so strenuously supported by
voluptuous men as the very essence of modesty, though, in fact, its
bane, because it is a refinement on lust that men fall into who
have not sufficient virtue to relish the innocent pleasures of
love. A man of delicacy carries his notions of modesty still
further, for neither weakness nor sensibility will gratify him--he
looks for affection.
Again. Men boast of their triumphs over women. What do they boast
of? Truly the creature of sensibility was surprised by her
sensibility into folly--into vice;[6] and the dreadful reckoning
falls
heavily on her own weak head, when reason wakes. For where art thou
to find comfort, forlorn and disconsolate one? He who ought to have
directed thy reason, and supported thy weakness, has betrayed thee.
In a dream of passion thou consented to wander through flowery
lawns, and heedlessly stepping over the precipice to which they
guide, instead of guarding, lured thee; thou startest from thy
dream only to face a sneering, frowning world, and to find thyself
alone in a waste, for he that triumphed in thy weakness is now
pursuing new conquests. But for thee there is no redemption on this
side the grave! And what resource hast thou in an enervated mind to
raise a sinking heart?
But if the sexes be really to live in a state of warfare, if Nature
have pointed it out, let them act nobly, or let pride whisper to
them that the victory is mean when they merely vanquish
sensibility. The real conquest is that over affection not taken by
surprise, when, like Heloisa, a woman gives up all the world
deliberately for love. I do n